Impostor Syndrome SOS: Release Yourself

Casey Onder, PhD
2 min readFeb 26


Photo by Hulki Okan Tabak on Unsplash

Pssst, high performer.

Tired of trying to prove yourself?

Of impostor syndrome?

Of burnout, or work-induced emotional rollercoasters?

Of people pleasing, or being everything to everyone?

Or trying to win, win approval, or even do the right thing?

Credit to LifeHikes (by way of my colleague Jason Frazell) for this wisdom bomb…

Get over yourself.

Seem harsh? With loving intent it will free you, relaxing or at least raising awareness of fear and scarcity based behavior.

And thou doth protest…

Isn’t that disempowering?

Don’t I need more self-love and confidence?

Shouldn’t I pay more attention to myself, not less?

Yes and no.

Yes, because the parts of you that feel drained, unworthy and/or unsafe could use some TLC.

No, because there’s nothing to prove in a spiritual sense. You are whole and complete.

Update your outdated OS, and all the self preoccupations that keep you unhappily hustling or holding back (AKA ego viruses) fall away.

You work for the joy of it. Welcome to freedom, creativity, generosity, spirit, warm work fuzzies, and a profound sense of peace.

You can experience these things and be rewarded handsomely and help others — promise!

It’s possible to be successful without grinding your way through life (or hiding yourself).

It’s possible to be successful au naturel.

It’s possible to be successful “selfishly” putting joy first.

I say this having known a fair share of suffering, unsavory characters, darkest of dark corners of spiritual skepticism, and a rocky (mostly resistant) relationship with achievement.

Getting over yourself means acceptance with high effort. Getting over yourself means optimizing your form to your purpose, putting your true self first. Getting over yourself means lovelovelove in the purest sense, the glorious mess of it.

Authenticity transcends your ego.

And while I genuinely hope you work and live well beyond your egoic eccentricities, during your time here on earth your ego ain’t going away.

Learn to love and work with it. Get it whipped into shape, that mischievous mother****er.

Get over yourself. Focus on function over form. You’ll feel and do better, eventually if not immediate.

Try it if you’re keen to…

Don’t blindly take advice or opinions from others — not from your ego or your neighbors’ — much less from little old me… :)

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Casey Onder, PhD

Psychologist, success coach, believer in solid behavioral science and the power of tuning in.